Happy Friday, guys!!! Now I usually reserve Friday posts for Fashion Fridays and I have a little of that below but I wanted to switch things up and talk about a little funny feeling I’ve had for a really long time….
I feel like I’ve always dealt with anxiety. I’m naturally a people pleaser. Like to my core. When I was a kid, all my parents had to say to me was “Melissa, I’m disappointed.” and I would be a mess on the floor, crying and apologizing and vowing to never disappoint them again. I was prone to being anxious because I wanted everyone to like me. Although I carried that mindset into adulthood, it was quite manageable — until I had my sons. A lot of people have heard of post-partum depression but only a few have heard of post-partum anxiety… I am here to tell you that it is REAL.
My anxiety has morphed into an uninvited guest who interrupts in the most inopportune of times, like when I’m trying to go to sleep, for example. It has caused me to miss out on social gatherings and has made me second guess decisions I’ve made. Anxiety makes irrational fears seem real. It takes your insecurities and makes you believe that the worst case scenario will happen. Although others may not be able to see it, my anxiety is crippling and sometimes debilitating by manifesting itself physically in the form of headaches and heart palpitations. I’m anxious about everything — whether or not people like me or are talking about me behind my back, if I’m doing a good job in being a wife and mother, whether or not I locked the door before I left the house and someone will rob us, did I turn off the flat iron after I finished my hair or will I come home to my house burned down. All of it.
Living in an anxious space is no place to be. More importantly I KNOW it’s not where God wants me to be. So I have been battling it and by God’s grace have come to a healthier state of mind. Here are a few of the ways I’ve done it:
- Meditate on/Proclaim God’s Word: I realize that this may sound cliché but it TRULY has worked for me. God has given us such an amazing resource in His Word. My favorite verse is Philippians 4:6,7 which says,
Be anxious for nothing but in everything, by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving, let your requests be made known to God and the peace of God which surpasses all understanding will guard your hearts and minds through Christ Jesus.
How could you NOT be reassured in this?! God is ready to take on ANYTHING we could tell Him. Sometimes just talking through my anxieties helps and who better to talk to than the Creator and my Maker? (Here are a few other REALLY good verses I turn to:
- Proverbs 3:5, 6
- John 14:27
- 2 Thessalonians 3:16.
- Clear my Mind: My favorite shows on TV include anything on the Food Network (my obsession is slightly ridiculous) and crime solving shows. Things like Law and Order (everything single one) and CSI and Criminal Minds. Yeah, do you know what thoughts enter your head when it’s 1 AM and you’ve watched those shows all day? Do you know how many scenarios I’ve made up just by hearing the ice maker in the fridge go off? Not good ones. So I had to let a lot of these shows go. For my sanity. And for sleep.
- Let. It. Go: There are times when I simply just need to let. It. Go. Whatever “it” is. When I hold on to things or replay situations in my mind over and over again, it builds up and causes anxiety. For NO good reason. I have to do my best, trust God and then release it. If you can’t change it, don’t stress it.
I know these are really simple but these helped me. If you have anxiety and none of these steps seem to help you, I would definitely suggest getting professional help. I say this completely unashamedly and with no judgement. God has provided excellent doctors and counselors to help us and I believe it would be foolish to not seek help when you truly need it. I pray this has removed some of the stigma associated with anxiety and let’s SOMEONE know that you are NOT alone.
Now for Fashion Friday….
Flowers. Off the shoulder. Side slits. Block heels. What else do you need??? I love this dress!! It’s so flattering and the slits make it so flirty, perfect for a date night. It definitely gives me vacation vibes as well. I chose to accessorize with a simple black blocked heel and black earrings. My dress is from Ross Dress for Less and cost less than $15.
Hope you guys have an amazing weekend, full of God’s peace.